Emotional Neglect and the Adult in Psychotherapy

This book presents a truly amazing combination with its exclusive focus on emotional neglect and also the specific aspect of how the issues play out in therapy. And while the book is geared to therapists, I think any client who wants to understand what makes them act the way they do in therapy stands much to gain from it. Unlike many other books, which explain emotional neglect alongside abuse, the author has a direct and specific focus on what she calls “ignored children.” It validates the lack and the consequential issues in a very real and targeted way. The author really gets it! There’s something so comforting in reading about this as a described experience. These things we do (and perhaps even more importantly, don’t do) are so for a reason. It also explores things from both a developmental and neuroscientific perspective, and I found so much that resonated in all aspects. The shame borne from this “ignored” experience — the very shame that makes therapy so shameful and so slow — is explored on many levels too. And while this is not a self-help book, and the guidance for therapists are not necessarily of practical interest for a client (as well as some of the interventions described), I found it to be a very valuable read.